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     “Dad, stop stroking the zucchini like that,” my son, Logan, says, and I peer over at him, my prize possession cradled in my hands. We’re at the local Santa Cruz Farmer’s Market, and I love it. This place sells everything from lotions to fresh fruit and veggies. There’s even a man here who makes tweed penis hats. I have one that my wife, Jeanette, secretly likes. I wear it and dance like a tango master. She pretends to be annoyed, but I see the way she blushes. It turns her on.

     “It looks like you’re stroking a dick when you do that,” Logan adds with a laugh and then picks up a cucumber and demonstrates how I look. I mean, I admit it does look a bit like a zucchini handjob, but god, his mind is filthy. Not everything is about cock.

     “I’m not stroking it,” I say, adjusting my beloved tweed hat on my head. My son cackled when he saw it for the first time; he said it looked like a lampshade. Well, I happen to like it. The top of my head gets hot when I wear ball caps but this one is more like a visor, so it allows my scalp to breathe. I need to take care of my hair—don’t wanna go bald.

     I eye my zucchini once more. This guy was grown from a little seedling, and I’m going to have a hard time parting with it. Maybe it’s because I smoked a little once I got here, but I always feel a little emotional when I part with my veggies. I have a whole stand full of the things I’ve grown in my backyard greenhouse, along with the eggs from my chickens. I think my next venture will be selling homemade wine. I even have some grape vines out back that are doing better than expected. 

     I may need a bigger house. I have big dreams. It’s hard to fit them all into a small plot of land. I need room to grow

     “But you look like you’re fondling a dick when you pet it like that.”

     “I do not,” I say and then reach out and whack him upside the head with it—not so hard that it will damage my zucchini, but enough to make an impression. I never spanked my kids when they were growing up, but I did chuck a carrot at them a time or two. Sometimes I aimed for the eyes.

     “Hey!” Logan grumbles, rubbing the side of his head, looking shocked. “That’s not nice.” His boyfriend, Theo, is sitting in a chair behind us, a chemistry book open in his lap, and his lips pulled up in a smirk. Well, at least he’s on my side. He has to know that Logan picks on me and has gotten what he deserves.

     “Well, neither is you calling my zucchini a dick.”

     He grins at me, and I thump his head again. He doesn’t duck like he should—because honestly, what does he expect?—and glowers at me in response. Well, it’s not my fault he’s slow on the reflexes. He should do better. I didn’t pay for all those swim lessons for nothing.

     “It echoed when I did that,” I say with a smile.

     Logan eyes me, still rubbing the side of his head. “Huh? Did what?”

     “When I thumped your head, it echoed.”

     He narrows his eyes at me, grabs the zucchini from my hand, and whacks me on the head too. My mouth falls open in a gasp.

     “You did not just do that,” I say, staring at the zucchini he’s wielding like a sword. “The betrayal. You know I love these like children.”

     “Serves you right. And it echoed in there too. Like father, like son.”

     I grab my vegetable back and cradle it to my chest, happy it’s not damaged. I cannot believe him, but then I look at his dopey grin and I can’t help but smile goofily back at him. Gah, I love my kids. I’m so glad he’s up here, visiting me this week. I was a bit lonely with my wife off on a spa retreat up in Sonoma County. She just left me all alone in that big house. Although, I’ve been known to get lost for hours in my greenhouse, but still. It’s nice to have the house full again. 

     I know that Landon and Finn are also going to be making an appearance at the end of the week. Damn, I’m a lucky man. Me, my wife, my sons, and my animals….

     “Shoot, where’s Vincent?” I ask as I frantically glance around for my pet goat. Usually, I can find the big oaf sneakily munching on my veggies, but he’s not here.

     “He was tied up,” Logan says and then sighs as he picks up the ragged end of a chewed-apart leash that’s lying on the ground. “I don’t know why you get the fabric ones.”

     “They’re better for his fur. It’s delicate.”

     “Dad,” Logan says with a laugh and then shakes his head. “This is like the fifth leash he’s chewed through.”

     “He’s adventurous. I don’t want to break his spirit,” I say, and Theo chuckles behind us. If he saw Vincent prance off and didn’t say anything, I will not make his cat another addition to her kitty palace. I will not…oh, who am I kidding? I so will. I already have the materials for a kitty dining table and chairs. I’m even thinking of adding a catio so Curie can safely go outside to bask in the sunlight and stare at the birdies.

     I haven’t convinced Jeanette to let me bust through a wall yet, though. I don’t want to push her too hard. She already caved on the vines for wine a few months ago. I count that as a win. I have to ease her into these projects slowly. Like a ninja. 

     “Did you see him run off?” I ask Theo, and he shakes his head.

     “I wouldn’t have let your goat run off, Basil,” he says and then shuts his book and stands up. “But I’ll go look around for him. I’m sure he’s off munching on something he shouldn’t and getting into trouble. As expected.”

     And then, without another word, Theo is marching off with those long legs of his in search of my goat. I’m sure he’s around here somewhere, and because Vincent usually accompanies me to the farmer’s market, everyone knows he’s mine. This isn’t the first time he’s escaped and managed to make new friends. He’s a fan favorite. 

     “He’ll be fine, Dad,” Logan says, throwing his arm around my shoulders and jostling me slightly. “He’s just hungry.”

     My eyes well with tears and I swipe at them. “Yeah, I just worry every time he escapes. What if one day he doesn’t come back?”

     Logan sighs and then shakes his head. “He always comes back. Don’t worry, Dad. Why are you crying?”

     “I just miss him,” I say.

     Logan chuckles lightly. “Did you smoke before you got here?”

     “Just a bit.” A sigh escapes me because I can’t just blubber like this. I have customers. One is ogling my tomatoes right now and I’d really like to sell them. So I square my shoulders and move away from my son.

Vincent will be fine. He’ll be home in no time. I have to believe that.

     Time to sell my veggies.



     “Babe,” Caleb says as we stroll through the throngs of people at the farmer’s market. Someone sneezes to my right, and I lean as far away as possible. They should be wearing a mask. This is a hotbed for disease. There are far too many people here if you ask me. Far too many. But then again, Caleb isn’t bothered by it at all. He seems to thrive in the chaos. 

     I’d rather stay in my nice little apartment with my Clorox wipes. It’s much easier that way. I like things nice and clean…well, except Caleb. 

     I like him fucking messy and writhing beneath me.

     My cock twitches in my pants, and I sigh. It’s perpetual now. I cannot get enough.

     “Look at that those eggplants,” Caleb gasps. “We should buy some and try to shoot them from the potato gun when Sem and Luke get here.”

     I raise an eyebrow at him because that sounds like a terrible idea.

     Last month, after visiting Caleb’s family in the high desert, we all made plans to travel up here to Northern California together—an escape of sorts. 

     I’ve been looking forward to it, mainly because Caleb and I left a day early to just spend some time alone together. 

     And we did. Oh god, the things I did to him last night.

     The way I had him flipped on all fours, his hat on backwards, his ass pressing back against me. The way I slid into his tight, wet hole. The way he arched his muscular back and moaned for me as I slammed into him. 

     I sometimes still can’t believe he’s mine. I look at him and wonder why the fuck he ever married me. But he did. 

     He’s mine. I’m never letting him go.

     Caleb suddenly grabs my hand and pulls me unwillingly toward a table that’s selling something that looks like incense, but is probably more like weed. I don’t trust anything about Northern California. The people up here aren’t quite right. They smile a little too much and look a little dazed.

     I don’t trust people with bloodshot eyes. 

     “We should get some of this stuff,” Caleb says, picking up a large wrapped bundle of…herbs?

     I side-eye him because I refuse to chant and wave this shit around our apartment. Refuse. The amount of ash this thing looks like it would produce could take days to vacuum up. And let’s be honest, Caleb doesn’t vacuum—unless hoovering my dick counts.

     “Why would we need that?” I ask.

     Caleb pulls his bottom lip between his teeth and glances over at the vendor. We already have so much shit we don’t need. It’s in a bag dangling from Caleb’s left arm, and yet, who am I to say no to him?

     I never want to say no to him ever again. But I will questions things. Like this bundle of sage, or whatever the fuck it is. We do not need this.

     “Why would we need this?” Caleb repeats my question to the woman behind the table. She’s wearing a floral dress and has beads in her hair for some unknown reason. Beads. She cannot be trusted.

     “To ward off evil spirits,” the woman replies, and I sigh loudly.

     Caleb’s eyes widen at that and he bobs his head, pulling out his wallet and handing over some cash. “We don’t want to mess with the supernatural,” he tells me with a smile, and I’m not sure if he’s being serious or not.

I sometimes can’t tell.

     When the herbs are tucked away in the bag and the beaded woman looks smug, Caleb pulls me in for a long kiss, my body pressed up against his. Suddenly, all of this nonsense is forgotten. I want to head back to the motel, strip him naked, and run my tongue along the strong, hard planes of him. I want to spread those thick, muscular thighs open and push my way into his body.

     Fuck. I can’t ever get enough of him. It seems he can’t get enough of me either because his cock is already hard and pressed up against me.

     The way he moans, the way he pants for me…I can’t believe he’s mine.

     He’s fucking mine.

     Before I can get too sidetracked, or even open my mouth to suggest to Caleb that we head straight back to our room, I feel something brush against my ankle. My eyes swivel down, and I see a goat nibbling on my shoe.

     “What the hell?” I murmur, and Caleb breaks away from me, glancing down and smiling widely.

     “Oh my god. It’s a goat! In the wild!”

     Caleb swoops down and hoists it up into his arms. 

     My eyes widen, and I huff in frustration because goats are dirty little fuckers.

     “Caleb, put it down,” I hiss, trying to use my serious voice, but Caleb looks so silly holding the damn thing. 

“Goats carry all sorts of bacteria…and parasites…ticks, for instance….”

     “They do not,” he says and then nuzzles his face right in its fur. 

     I just about die. Oh god no. Before we fuck tonight, I am washing him down, nice and thoroughly. I mean, it won’t be a hardship at all, but it will have to be done. There are a lot of things I can get behind, but this is not one of them.

     “Oh, there he is,” a deep voice says to our left, and we both turn to see a tall, thin guy standing with his arms folded across his chest. His hair is a little tousled and his shirt is a little too baggy on him, but he’s nice-looking, in his own way.

     “Uhhh, yeah, so that goat is…well, he’s mine,” he says and then shakes his head. “Well, not mine, but my boyfriend’s dad’s goat…long story.”

     Caleb nods his head, still holding on to the farm animal. He seems a little too reluctant to let the goat go. It’s quite concerning actually. 

     “He’s so cute, what’s his name?”

     The guy stares at Caleb and then at me. “Vincent.”

     “Ah, well, I can bring him back to his owner. Wouldn’t mind holding this little dude a while longer. Lead the way.”

     Oh, god. Does this mean we’re getting a goat? I’m going to have to convince him that that would be a terrible idea. I’ll convince him using my tongue. Because I could not survive the mess a farm animal would make in our apartment. I’ll take the sage bundle any day. We can ward off evil spirits with an entire sage plant if need be. But dear god, no goats.

     “We aren’t getting a goat,” I murmur to Caleb who is practically humming with excitement.

     “Meh, it’s up for discussion, I think.”

     “It is not,” I reply and Caleb just glances at me.

     “Babe. We can discuss it like adults.”

     I huff and then eye him again. Fuck, he’s so hot. I cannot believe he’s still into me. Maybe I should get him a goat.

     A minute later we are in front of a stand that has vegetables and eggs lining the table. Behind the stall is a large banner that says Basil’s Bushels and underneath it are two men who look very much like father and son. They both have strong builds, almost like they’re athletes, and the same dopey grin on their faces. The younger one has longer, curlier hair, and his father is wearing some type of hat on his head that doesn’t have a top. It’s more like a visor, I think, leaving the top of his head exposed. I’m not quite sure of its purpose, and I’m not quite sure I wanna know. Strange. Very, very strange.

     “Ah! Vincent! You can’t just wander off like that,” the older man says, holding his arms open for the goat.  Caleb reluctantly hands him over, and I’m immediately brushing his shirt clean, needing to get the goat hair off of him. Perhaps I should buy him a new shirt, just in case. It really isn’t a hardship to watch him strip the fabric over his head. I enjoy it far too much.

     “I’m fine. Stop making a fuss,” Caleb says and then leans over and kisses me softly.

     The younger, curly-haired guy behind the table beams at us and then pulls the thinner guy into him, pressing his lips to his cheek. The thinner one just blushes and pulls the neck of his shirt up over his face. Only his eyes peek out.

     “Logan, honestly, we’re in public,” he murmurs, and I watch as Logan grins at him.

     “But they’re giving me all sorts of ideas, Theo, and you look so sexy in that shirt,” he says, and Theo hides a little further behind the neckline.

     “Hey, thanks for finding my goat. You guys interested in some fresh veggies? They’re on me,” the older man says.

     “Oh, sure! Yeah,” Caleb says excitedly, and I suppress an eye roll. Because since when does Caleb eat vegetables? These will be going in the compost pile once they rot.

     “I’m Basil, by the way. You guys from around here?” the man asks. 

     “No, we’re from SoCal, actually. We have a little vacation up here planned with my cousins and some friends for the next few days. I wanted Whit to see the trees.”

     No, what Caleb had said was he wanted me to fuck him up against a tree, but I’m not telling anyone that.

     “Actually, I convinced him to come by telling him I wanted him to fuck me against a tree…” Caleb blurts, and my cheeks flush red. Oh my god.

     Logan laughs at that, jostling Theo, and says, “That sounds fun, right?” Theo just covers his eyes with his hand. “We’ve never done it against a tree before. Tree sex.”

     Basil shakes his head and chuckles, talking to a bucket of carrots and Theo meets my stare. I arch an eyebrow at him and he shrugs. Because really, there’s nothing to do about it now. We’ve attached ourselves to these men and there’s no turning back.

     “Hey,” Basil chimes in. “You know what? Since you’re here for a bit, why don’t you come over to my place and hang out? I can show you the swing I made for Vincent….”

     “Oh,” Caleb replies and smiles widely. “That would be cool. I’ve never seen a goat on a swing.”

     “I also have a goat bridge…and chickens!”

     I don’t even get a chance to protest before Caleb’s agreeing to go to this man’s home. We don’t even know him, for fuck’s sake. And we are just going to wander into someone’s house? This is a recipe for disaster.

     But then again, I’m not surprised. This is my life now. 

     And I wouldn’t change it for the world.



     “Oh god,” Caleb moans as I push into him, his cock wet and straining toward me. The way he tastes…fuck…the way he sounds.

     We made it back to our motel after the farmer’s market, and I stripped him out of those goat clothes and shoved him into the shower. Once he was thoroughly clean, I teased him with my hands and tongue until he was begging. I love the taste of him, the feel of every part of him.

     I speared him with my tongue until he was chanting my name, my hand working his cock as I ate his ass.

     “We are not getting a farm animal,” I mutter as my cock slides all the way home with a slap.

     Caleb’s big blue eyes meet mine and he manages a small smile.

     “Whit,” he pants, his hands sliding up my arms and clutching my shoulders. “Whit, please.”

     The way he says that, the way he needs me. The goat is forgotten as I snap my hips back and slam into him once more. His body is still damp from the shower and he smells so damn clean and so much like him. I can still taste him on my tongue.

     “Fuck, you feel so good,” I say, leaning down and pressing my lips to his in a sloppy kiss. Caleb arches up, his hand threading through my hair, holding me to him as I plow inside his tight hole.

     “More. Deeper,” he moans, and I pull back, pressing his feet against my chest as I hammer home, impaling him on my cock over and over. Caleb writhes beneath me, his hand moving to his dick as he jerks himself frantically. 

     “Oh, god,” he cries out, and I lean over him, his knees now pressed up to his chest, my fingers tugging on his nipple ring.

     He cries out, sweat dripping down his face, and I want to lick it up, want to go feral for him.

     “Hands off,” I grunt, and Caleb whimpers, his blue eyes hooded, his fingers moving off his dick and gripping the back of my neck.

     “Please,” he begs, and I fuck into him harder, finding the angle I’ve memorized that drives him out of his mind. It only takes a few more pumps of my hips for his cum to hit his chest. 

     Only then do I let myself fall over the edge, riding wave after wave of my orgasm.

     “Oh hell,” Caleb whispers, breathing deeply. “So damn good, babe. Always so good.”

     I pull out of him, relishing in the sight of my cum leaking from his ass as I do. I flop over on my side, sweating and exhausted as I stare at him.

     God, I love him so much. I gave it all up for him and it was worth it.

     Caleb turns his head and then scoots over to where I am, nearly crawling on top of me.

     “We should shower again and go. Don’t wanna be rude by being late,” he says, pressing his face into my neck and sinking down on top of me. I love the press of his weight against me, the feel of his warm skin against mine. To think, this is how it all started between us.

     “We can take our time,” I say. “We don’t know these people. If we never show up, they won’t care.”

     “I’ll care. I wanna see a goat on a swing, Whit. I never knew I needed it until Basil told us about it.”

     “You can watch it on YouTube.”

     “Nah, I need to see it in real life.”

     He peers down at me and then snuggles into me again, my hands wrapping around his back and holding him to me. I can hear his heart pounding in his chest, and I sigh in satisfaction. 

     “Mmm, but we can go after I rest my eyes for just a bit. I need a break after that fuck. Your dick is so good.”

A minute later he’s snoring softly, and I just let myself be weighed down by him as I too, drift off to sleep.



     “Oh my god, look at this kitty castle,” I say, feeling my face nearly crack wide open as I take in the enormous structure lining an entire wall of Basil’s living room. It has a tower and some kind of keep right at the top. This looks like it took hours to build. Days even. I’m slightly envious. I want one for our future cat.

     Basil beams at me, and I feel a sort of camaraderie with him. I felt it the moment I watched him talk to his carrots. I think I’m gonna be like him when I get older—building my cat some kind of palace where she can sit and tower over everyone. 

     The gray cat in question sits at the very top of the structure, curled up, her chin resting on the carpeted corner of a room. Her golden eyes follow me and her whiskers twitch. Not sure if she’s plotting my demise or wishing me a speedy death. Could be both, probably.

     “What’s her name?” I ask.

     “Curie,” Basil says. “She’s not mine, but I’ve adopted her. She’s an honorary Lewis now. She’s Theo’s. But with the way they’re going, maybe it won’t just be honorary. Maybe they’ll tie the knot soon.”

     I glance over to where Theo and Logan sit in the kitchen, the two of them mixing drinks. Well, Theo is mixing them and Logan is just goofing off, juggling some oranges.

     Whit keeps peering over, looking wary of this entire situation, but I know he’ll give this entire afternoon a shot. For me. 

     Man, the things he does for me. He puts himself outside of his comfort zone all the time by just being with me. But I like to tell myself it’s good for him. If it wasn’t for me, he’d be inside all day, reading and cleaning the counters.

     Curie blinks down at me, and I reach up and pet her soft fur. She leans into my palm, letting me scratch behind her ear and then she swats at my hand and hisses at me.

     “I think she likes me,” I say, and Basil bobs his head, looking so damn excited.

     “She sure does. She’s a tough cookie, but she has a lot of love inside of her. Especially when you get her high on catnip. But, I mean, who isn’t nice when they’re high?”

     I bite back a laugh as Whit slides closer to me, his fingers slipping up under my shirt and sliding across my skin. Oh hell, those fingers make me think about all the filthy things, and even though my ass is still sore, I want to go again.

     But that would be rude if we did it here, in another person’s house. Right?

     Unless we were really sneaky. Then really, what’s the harm?

     “Wanna see the swing now? And my veggie patch? I just planted rutabagas,” Basil blurts, looking like he’s been trying to play it cool but just lost all his restraint. I know how he feels. It’s how I am with Whit. And anything that includes fireworks. I can get all kinds of worked-up over those.

     Theo walks over with a dark-green glass filled with clear bubbly liquid inside and a beer bottle. “A gin and tonic for you, Whit, and here you go, Caleb.”

     I grab the beer, clinking it against the glass that Whit’s now holding and staring into ominously. I can almost read his mind. He’s probably wondering if it’s been drugged. Actually, he’s probably more worried the glass isn’t clean. 

     Sometimes I wonder how he’s married to me. I’m a mess. A hot one, but a mess nonetheless.

     “Take a sip, babe, and relax.”

     He huffs and eyes me before pressing those sexy lips to the brim of the cup and taking a sip. He looks good doing it—looks like he’s sipping at my cock. He should so do that to me tonight. Just drink me down like a margarita. 

     “Come on, it’s right out back,” Basil says, turning a little too fast and knocking his hand on the side of the kitty hotel. Curie glowers at him and Basil shushes her, waggling his finger. 

     “Don’t be such a grump, little kitty,” he says and then swings his hand toward the sliding glass door, looking ready to break out in song. 

     Whit eyes me one more time as if to ask if we’re really doing this, but hell yeah, I am. I am so ready for this. I wanna see this infamous veggie patch Basil went on and on about, and the goat swing sounds really cool.

     A moment later, we all step out onto a large wooden porch, and I hear the sound of chickens clucking nearby. So cool. Love those little assholes. My aunt had some for a while until the coyotes ate them. And Luke might have shot one, just by accident. He buried the body so no one would know. Although, I think my aunt knows. She knows all.

     I probably shouldn’t tell Basil about the dead chickens. He looks like he might cry if I did. He seems like a sensitive soul.

     “That’s my greenhouse. Built it myself,” Basil says, waving his hand toward a large enclosure in the distance.       “And that’s the shed. Didn’t build that. Just bought it at Home Depot.”

     “The shed,” Whit huffs. “Probably bodies buried in there.”

     I pull Whit into my side a little too roughly and press a kiss to his temple.

     “Don’t be an asshole,” I tell him, and his cheeks flush as he looks at me.

     “Fine. I’ll be nice.”

     God, he’s adorable. I stood no chance with this guy. 

     “I love you,” I say. “I know you’re humoring me, and it makes me even crazier for you.”

Whit’s hand slides a little lower around my waist and my dick perks up, getting all sorts of ideas. I love that I can drive him crazy like this—love that he’s still so into me.

     Logan pipes up a second later, pulling my mind away from imagining Whit naked. “The shed is where Dad goes to get high and munch on his veggies.”

     Basil nods. “The shed is the perfect place for that. We can have a little smoke later. And I grow all the weed myself, so you know it’s clean. And listen, I’ll show this cool trick I learned that you can do with a head of lettuce and dressing.”

     “Why does that sound sexual?” Theo asks, and Whit turns to look at him, the corners of their lips quirking up at the same time. It’s like looking in a mirror.

     Oh, two peas in a pod, these guys. I swear. Kindred spirits. Maybe Whit will have more fun than he thinks. The two of them can grump around together.

     “Oh, okay, watch your step,” Basil says and then swings his arm around and announces, “Ta-da! Here’s the swing. Built it from a design off Pinterest. I have a whole board going with goat stuff. Drives my wife wild.”

     “More like insane,” Theo says, and Whit snorts a laugh.

     I bite back a laugh too, watching as Vincent stands on the swing, his jaw working, the contraption swinging back and forth.

     “He looks happy,” I say, reaching out to pet him. I can’t help it. He just looks too adorable. 

     “He is. And he will be even happier next month when we get another goat friend,” Basil replies.

     “You finally convinced Mom?” Logan asks, and Basil shrugs, placing his hands behind his back and looking skyward.

     “Kind of.”

     Theo shakes his head, chiming in, “That’s a definite no. You know that, right, Basil? She said absolutely not, if I remember correctly.”

     Basil snorts. “Pfft. Of course I know that. I totally know.”

     And then he moves forward, continuing to show us around the property, pointing out the goat bridge and then the greenhouse once more. 

     “I think he really wants us to go inside,” I whisper to Whit, and he huffs a small laugh.

     “Seems so.”

     “So, guys. Wanna see my squash? I have pumpkins. Big ones.”

     Logan waggles his eyebrows as Theo shifts nervously next to his boyfriend. I wonder what that is about. But then I realize, I don’t need to wait long to find out. Logan seems to be an open book. 

     “The things we’ve done in there, huh, Theo,” he says softly, and my mind whirls with possibilities. Never thought to do anything in a greenhouse before, but then again, what do I know? I learn new things every day. 

     “The things you can do with strawberries,” Logan tells me like he’s divulging a secret, and the hoodie that Theo is now wearing has gone over his head as he disappears into the fabric. I can’t even see his face anymore. 

     “What can you do with strawberries?” I ask, and Logan leans toward me.

     “You can stuff them…”

     “Do not even, or we are getting divorced!” Theo hisses, and Whit smirks at me.

     “We aren’t even married.”

     “Yet. We are not married yet. But I will file preemptive paperwork if you utter one more word, Logan.”

     Logan just snorts. “Don’t know what that means. My man is so smart.”

     And Theo just sighs loudly from inside of his hood.

     “He gets me, I think,” Whit whispers, and I roll my eyes.

     “Of course he does. You are the same. It’s kind of eerie, actually.”

     “Hurry, guys! I have so much to show you,” Basil calls out, and then we all follow him into the greenhouse.



     As we are touring the rows of carrots and onions—which honestly, isn’t as exciting as Basil made it out to be, I mean, it’s just rows of green leaves—my phone buzzes in my pocket.

     “Oh, it’s Emery,” I tell no one in particular as I swipe at his name. We met through Magnus about eight months ago and he’s kind of latched on. He’s a cool dude and fucking funny most of the time. I don’t even think he means to be, which makes it even better.

      “Hey, dude,” I say, and I hear rustling in the background before a rush of swear words and then a pop. No clue what’s going on, but he probably dialed and then got distracted. Happens to the best of us.

     “Oh, hi, Caleb. It’s Emery. I actually meant to call Whit, but this works too. Um…so, I made a tiny weeny mistake.”

     “Never heard of a weeny mistake.”

     “It’s the tiniest of them all. But anyways, you’re getting me off topic…yes, August. I know. I am getting to the point…I was going to just tell him, but then he mentioned wieners and I started thinking about your dick. And we all know I’m like a hound when it comes to that, just sniffing it right out.”

      There’s another rustle and then Emery adds, “Okay, okay, yes, so I got the dates wrong and we are actually here a day early. And god, I never actually hit submit when I reserved the hotel room, so we are technically homeless…and that’s fine because we did manage to survive a snowstorm in the back of a car. My man is an Eagle Scout, he was going to dig me out a snow cave….”

     “Give me the phone, Em,” I vaguely hear August say and then Emery mutters a heartfelt apology to his boyfriend before August gets on the line with me. He’s probably trying to get the conversation back on topic.  Not that I minded. I always do like to see where Emery takes it. Wild rides, good times.

     “Sorry, hey, Caleb. Yeah, so the dates got mixed up like Em said, and we didn’t manage to book a place, so… Do you have space for us in your room just for tonight while we find a place to stay?”

     “Um…” I mean, we do, but I don’t want to share a place with anyone. I want privacy with Whit so he can do that thing to my ass all over again tonight. The one where he sticks his tongue right up inside of me and makes me moan like a whore.

     I really like that.

     “Hello?” August asks, and I blink back to reality.

     “Yeah, sorry, man, we don’t have space,” I lie, and Whit eyes me with disapproval. But listen, I really want that ass eating. I want it bad.

     “Oh, do you have friends coming to visit?” Basil asks, walking up with some gardening gloves on and an asparagus in one hand. It looks like he’s taken a bite off the end, just a big-ass nibble.

     “Oh yeah, a couple friends of ours got here a day early and don’t have a place to stay.”

     “We have room here!” Basil says loudly and then beams. “The more the merrier. Do they like apple pie? Because I’m gonna make one hell of one tomorrow. Oh, and zucchini bread!”

     “I love pie and bread and candy!” I hear Emery shout, and Basil beams.

     “Tell them to come over. Give them my address. This is gonna be so fun.”

     I wonder, when I look at Whit, if he’ll agree that, yes, this is gonna be so fucking fun once Emery and August arrive. Because to me, all of us together sounds like a blast. Basil, Logan, and Theo are a nice addition to the craziness. 

     I send August the address and he replies that they are about twenty minutes away, leaving Basil to frantically finish showing us around. It seems to be hard for him because he wants to show off everything he’s done, and I don’t blame him, it’s an accomplishment keeping all of this alive. I would have killed it all on day one.

     “Wonder what Luke and Sem would do with those pumpkins,” I say to Whit and he just shakes his head.

     “Do not get any ideas. You are not getting hurt again,” he replies. But I have so many ideas.

     “You know what I have, Basil?” I say and then point to a row of potatoes. “A potato gun.”

     Basil gasps. “You do?”

     “I do. Want me to make you one while we’re here? I can tell you what I’d need.”

     Logan claps his hands together. “Yes, I want that very much. I’m so damn excited. And guess who can help with blowing shit up. Theo. He’s a chemist.”

     “That so?” I ask, and my ideas take root and grow. I have full-on army man plans now. We could create the ultimate explosion.

     “Absolutely not,” Whit murmurs, but I just beam back at him. Because yes, absolutely yes.

     Basil bobs his head and then beams. “I should have what we need in the garage. And if not, I can pick something up at the store. Let’s talk plans while we smoke.”

     “This sounds like a terrible idea. Weed and you all together…” Whit murmurs, but I convince him to follow me by lifting up my shirt and showing him my abs. He can’t resist me when I’m all muscly. He gets too excited.

     And it works. Two seconds later, we are crammed in the small space, Basil shuffling toward the cabinet situated at the back wall. 

     “Gonna roll us some smokes and then we can talk plans. And I heard you mention my pumpkins…”

     “Yeah, my cousins would go crazy for them,” I say, not adding that they’d like to blow them up. But then again, if Basil is this welcoming, I’m sure he’ll meet Sem and Luke in no time. And since Theo is a chemist….

     “Would you be opposed to showing us how to make something explode?” I ask Theo, and Whit huffs disapprovingly next to me, but I’m not deterred. Can’t wait for Emery to get here.

     Then we can be full of bad decisions together.


Farmers Market (1).png

Chapter 4



     “Oh, hello, kitty cat,” I say as I stumble through the front door. When we arrived at this house at the end of a dead-end street, I pulled out my phone and called Caleb. When he answered, he said just to walk on in and head out back to the shed. August wasn’t sure about just walking into a stranger’s house, but I fucking am. Let’s do this. I love sheds. All sorts of weird things in there, like shovels and hoes. And listen, I’ve accidentally walked into strangers’ houses quite a few times. 

     It’s really no big deal.

     Not that I’m telling August that. Don’t need him knowing this about me. Even though he loves me just as I am. 

     “I can’t wait to see Whit in a shed,” I say, reaching up to pet the cat but then retracting my hand when I see it glower at me. Not a friendly kitty then, it seems. Pussies are complicated. I much prefer dicks.

     August’s dick, but still….

     “Can’t imagine he’s having any fun,” August says as he smiles at me. 

     “I know, right? He’s probably wearing a hazmat suit. Oh hell, let’s hurry. I wanna see it,” I say and then nearly trip over the couch on my way toward the sliding glass door. Luckily, August is there to catch me. 

     He’s always doing that. He’s my rock in my chaotic sea.

     “Slow down, Em. We’ll get there,” August says, and I sigh, trying to slow my steps but getting all excited again once we’re outside.

     As soon as we step onto the porch I gasp.

     “It’s huge. We don’t have backyards like this where we live. We should move, August. Let’s move here.”

     August chuckles and shakes his head. “We aren’t moving, Em.”

     My mouth pouts as I lean into my boyfriend. God, he’s so hot and he smells like strawberries. I want to lick at his skin. Want to make him my popsicle. 

     “You smelling me again?” August asks with a smirk, and I roll my eyes.

     “Of course not! I’m just…I have allergies. It’s very green up here in NorCal. My sinuses aren’t used to it.”

     August smiles wider and then turns his head and looks around. 

     “Is that a greenhouse?”

     “Oh my god, I wanna go inside. I’ve never seen the inside of one before. You think this dude will let us? He seems super friendly.”

     “Yeah, maybe, if he doesn’t kill us in our sleep and use us for fertilizer.”

     I snort and then choke a little because August is so funny. God, he could be a comedian. I mean, it’s kind of dark and weird, but I can get behind it. I’ll always be in the front row cheering him on, just like he’s done with me.

     “Lex would love this. I bet this dude grows weed too…”

     Just as I say it, the shed opens and a large older man stumbles out, smoke wafting out behind him. 

     “You Emery and August?” he asks, and I wave a little too enthusiastically and I end up hitting August on the cheek.

     “Sorry,” I say as August rubs at his skin.

     “Yeah, I know,” he says softly, and I feel my heart flutter in my chest. He’s so damn nice. I’ve never been this happy in my entire life. I am so fucking in love with this guy.

     “You Basil?” I ask loudly, and the man beams.

     “Yep! You’re my new house guests! Welcome! Go on into the shed and have a smoke. I’m grabbing the dressing and some lettuce. You want anything? Chips? Chicken nuggets?”

     I eye August who has his eyebrows raised.

     “Nah, the lettuce is fine,” I say, and Basil bobs his head.

     “What does he need lettuce and dressing for?” August whispers.

     “I don’t know, but I’m so excited to find out!”

     I grab his hand and pull him forward, the two of us nearly running to the shed. To be fair, I’m running and August is being tugged along, but I cannot wait another minute for this. I need to see Whit in his hazmat suit.

     We barrel through the door, and I skid to a stop, my eyes swiveling around the small space. Some weird gardening tools are hanging on the walls and two guys I don’t know are sitting on a camping chair, one in the other’s lap. Then my eyes settle on Caleb and Whit in another chair. Caleb is sitting on Whit’s lap, a blunt in his hand.

     “Fucking nice is what this is,” he says and then waggles his eyebrows at me. “Glad you could make it, Emery. You too, August.”

     Whit sighs behind him, his hands up Caleb’s shirt. Yeah, he looks annoyed, but he’s copping a feel, so he can’t be too upset. I wanna smoke and touch August too. Bet that would feel real nice.

     “Want a hit?” Caleb asks, holding the blunt out to me, and I eye the two other guys as I take the weed from him.

     “Sure! Thanks. And who are our new friends?”

     “Ah, that’s Logan, Basil’s son, and this is Logan’s boyfriend, Theo.”

     “Ah, all gay up in here!” I say much too loudly, and August winces.

     “Oops, got excited,” I chuckle and then take a hit off the blunt.

     August eyes me. “Just one hit and that’s it.”

     I sigh, but know he’s right. I can’t go crazy or things could go sideways. And I kind of like it when August gets all bossy. Gets me all hot and bothered.

     “Here,” I say, handing the blunt to August. He wets those sexy lips of his and then takes a hit, his eyelids fluttering closed.

     Oh, yes. Maybe he will get super high and we can fuck. That’s not wrong, right?

     I lean toward my boyfriend and lower my voice. “If you’re high and we fuck, that would be okay, right?”

     “You’re thinking about that now? Here?”

     “Of course I am? Who do you think I am? A nun? You’re super hot, August. I want your D all the time.”

     “Okay, enough of this, love birds. Take a seat,” Caleb says, gesturing toward the floor.

     “Like how you’re offering up your seat,” August says, and Caleb rolls his eyes.

     “I’m not moving from my man’s lap, but you can sit on the floor. Basil says it’s fine.

     Just as he utters those words, Basil storms in, a bottle of dressing in one hand and a head of iceberg lettuce in his other.

     “I got the snacks!”

     August takes another hit of the joint and lowers himself onto the floor, and I scramble to follow, scooting between his spread thighs. Love these thighs. Love spreading them and licking my way down his hot-as-fuck abs.

     “Getting horny,” I say, trying to be subtle, but saying it much too loud.

     Everyone’s heads swivel toward me, and I smile.

     “My man is so hot. I can’t help it. You know how it is, right?”

     Both Logan and Caleb nod, making Whit and Theo close their eyes and shake their heads.

     “No need to be ashamed of your sex drive. I, for one, have a very strong one! I also like cuddling,” Basil exclaims, hitting the root of the head of lettuce with his hand and pulling it out. He then turns the lettuce so the hole he made is facing up and pours the dressing right inside.

     “Anyone want some of this?” he asks, pulling a leaf off the outside and dipping it in the hole where the dressing is.

     “Please don’t, Em,” August murmurs, but it’s too late. I’m too intrigued.

     I reach out and tear off a leaf, dip it in the hole and then stuff it in my mouth.

     “Tastes like salad,” I say, and Basil nods.

     “My special salad. I grew this lettuce myself. No chemicals. Totally organic.”

     “That dressing organic too?” Whit asks, and Basil shrugs, lighting a new blunt and inhaling.

     “Doesn’t matter. All that matters is that this is delicious.”

     “I agree,” I say and then reach out for more lettuce. “I could be a rabbit at this rate. This is amazing. And a genius presentation. I didn’t know how you remove the root of lettuce and now I know. I can’t wait to try that, August. We need to start eating salads.”

     A second later I feel something brush against my arm, and I look down to see a goat trotting in, its little beady goat eyes honed in on the lettuce head.

     “Ah! Vincent smelled the lettuce. Greedy little dude,” Basil says.

     He peels off a leaf and hands it to Vincent who immediately gobbles it up.

     “I thought I was hallucinating for a second until I remembered where we were,” August says, and I snort.

     “Me too, but apparently not. Why is he so cute?”

     Basil beams, looking like a proud father. “He just is. I saw him at the 4H fair and just had to have him, right, Theo?

     Theo looks over at us and then at Basil.

     “Yeah, that’s right.”

     Basil sighs, handing the head of lettuce to Logan who tears off a piece and stuffs it in his mouth. When he offers it to his boyfriend, Theo just shakes his head and passes it over to me. I happily take another bite, and when I hand it off to Caleb, he tears off a chunk while Whit just closes his eyes and seems to drift off to sleep.  Probably trying to get this night over with faster. Well, more for us.

     More weed and more lettuce.

     No. No more weed or I might die. I’ll just sniff the air a lot and get high that way, but no munchies. I am being good.

     I am the best.

     The room is spinning slightly, and I lean back against August, just taking it all in. This is the best fucking vacation ever. I am so glad we were invited. I’d be so bummed if I missed out on this.

     “Me too!” Basil says and sighs. “Glad to have you both.”

     I realize that I’ve been speaking out loud, but what else is new? Welcome to my life. I do this often.

     “Thanks for letting us stay. Got my days mixed up.”

     “Yep, he does that,” August says and then presses a kiss to my neck. Oh, I like that. I like it very much. He should keep doing that. For always.

     “I do get stuff mixed up. I have ADHD,” I say and then sigh loudly, leaning into my boyfriend’s lips. I want his lips on me all the time, all day and every night. Just stick that mouth on me August and make my dreams come true.

     “I love ADHD,” Basil says and then smiles at me. “It’s so fun.”

     “It is,” August replies, and my heart flutters in my chest. “Love that I never know what to expect with him. It’s always a surprise.”

     Gah! How did I get so lucky to have found him? How did I get so lucky that he would want to keep me?

     I dunno but I’m not gonna question it.

     I’m a lucky motherfucker.


     I might have only taken one hit of the marijuana, but the second-hand smoke in the shed was enough to make me high and horny. And August is looking delicious right now, all laid back and fuckable. Like a treat. And now that we’re alone in the guest room, I can do all the things to him.

     “Take off your clothes,” I say, pawing at him, needing him naked—needing him to lie back so I can spear him with my dick.

     “We’re high,” August says, reaching out and threading his fingers through my hair. Ngh, that feels real nice.  Don’t want him to stop. “I can’t believe I let you sit in there. That was so irresponsible with your diabetes.”

     “Don’t care. Just let me fuck you,” I say, ripping his shirt off his head and splaying my hands on his ripped chest. Oh hell, how is he a teacher? He’s the sexiest Mr. Rogers I’ve ever seen.

     “Did you bring the cardigan?” I ask, and August nods, waving his hand toward the duffle bags he packed. I’m off like a shot, ripping into his and pulling out the burgundy sweater. He has a whole array of them, one in every color.

     When I turn back around August is already naked, his legs spread, his fingers up his ass. Oh hell, he’s just as eager for it.

     I trip slightly trying to get back to him, falling against the side of the bed and hitting him in the face with the sweater.

     “Fuck,” he murmurs as I crawl up toward him, fumbling with my pants, trying to get them off all while touching him. I can’t stand keeping my hands to myself.

     “Ugh, damn clothes,” I mutter, kicking the fucking things off and crawling up August’s body. I lean down and kiss him sloppily, pulling my dick out of my boxers. I can’t be bothered to take them off—too much work.

     “Hurry,” August says, blinking up at me, his fingers still pushing inside himself.

     “I am.” I slap his hand away and set my cock right at his hole and slide in. It feels like coming home, like all the pieces have fallen right where they should.

     “I love you,” August moans as my hips meet his, my balls pressed up against his ass.

     “Love you more,” I reply before snapping my hips back and fucking into him. He holds on tight, his whimpers seared into my brain, and I don’t last long. Not at all. The weed is doing things to my libido.

     I come inside of him without warning, and August just peers up at me, his cock still hard. 

     “Sorry, that was so fast, but fuck, you’re too hot,” I murmur as I pull out of him and sloppily engulf his dick in my mouth.

     He arches up as I press my fingers inside of him again, finding his prostate and making him gasp.

     I’m a motherfucking pro at this and he comes on a silent scream, his cock pulsing on my tongue, unloading down my throat.

     “Oh fuck,” he murmurs and I smile, lapping at him and feeling like some kind of god because I love it when he swears for me. 

     “That is how you do it,” I say, flopping down on top of him and nuzzling into his neck. His hands move around to my back and he sighs contentedly.

     “You’re the blow job master.”

     “I am, but we never even used the cardigan.”

     “Next time,” he reassures me, and I let my eyes close.

     “Let me know if your blood sugar gets weird, okay?” he tells me softly, his voice drifting off in sleep, and I nod against him, letting my eyes fall closed as well. I’m not horny anymore; I’m just sleepy.

     “Can’t believe we’re staying in a stranger’s house,” August murmurs. “Did you lock the door?”

     “I totally locked it.”

     “Mmm, good. Don’t want to die tonight.”

     And then he’s out, his soft sores lulling me to sleep.

Chapter 5



     “Good morning!” a deep voice says from our bedroom door, telling me first and foremost that Emery did not, in fact, lock the door last night. “My eyes are closed, don’t worry and sorry to barge in, but breakfast is ready.”

     I groan, shifting my weight under Emery who is tucked in on top of me. Thank god the blankets are over our naked bodies, or else Basil would be getting a show. Not that he’s looking, but still. We’re in his house, in his bed. Fucking in this guest room seems a little rude, but then again, I wasn’t thinking very clearly last night.

     “Thanks,” I say and offer him a wave. Basil bobs his head, his eyes still closed, and then closes the door with a snick.

     I swear to god, never in my lifetime did I imagine being here, but I am. And I’ve been loving every minute of it. I mean, sometimes Emery surprises me, like he did when we showed up on our vacation a day early by accident. But I know I should have checked the itinerary myself. I’ve just been busy with work and so it fell by the wayside. And now, here we are, in Basil’s house. 

     A man we got high with last night, who we ate lettuce with, and who showed us his vegetable garden. He seemed particularly proud of his radishes.

     Oh god, I think as a laugh threatens to burst out of me. This is seriously my life now.

     “Em,” I say, rubbing his back. “Breakfast is ready.”

     “Mmmm, pancakes?” he asks and I let out a laugh because we both know how obsessed he is with syrup. One time he drizzled it on my dick and ate me like a crepe. 

     “Dunno,” I say and then roll to my side, Emery flopping onto the mattress. His hair is sideways, his cheek red from where it was pressed against my chest. My eyes just rove over him, taking him in. He’s so damn colorful and so fucking hot. My dick perks up, remembering the hazy sex we had last night. It always feels so good. I love how rabid he gets for me, like he can’t quite contain his excitement. It’s exhilarating. I’ve never thought I was particularly interesting, but with Emery, I feel like I’m the most exciting person in the world. 

     “Guess we better get up then,” he says, rubbing at his eyes, and I sit up. Because if I don’t, I’m gonna let him fuck me again, and Basil seems like the kind of guy who will show up outside of our door again if we aren’t downstairs in a few minutes. I mean, he has a gay son who apparently does things in the greenhouse with his boyfriend, but still, he probably doesn’t want to hear or see that.

     We dress quickly, exchanging a few kisses before making our way down the stairs and into the kitchen.

     Basil is wearing a neon-green apron, happily dishing everyone up plates of food. Whit and Caleb are already here, Caleb looking really happy as he shovels food into his mouth while Whit picks at his, still looking unsure.

     “Hey! Morning!” Basil says with a wide grin, handing us two plates with eggs, bacon, and waffles.

     “Oh, hell yes. Waffles,” Emery groans and then his eyelids flutter, making my cock thicken in my pants because that’s exactly how he sounds during sex. I sometimes wonder if he’d pick waffles over my ass. To be honest, if they had whipped cream and strawberries on them like these do, I’m pretty sure Emery would be devouring breakfast first. 

     Should probably do an experiment one day. For science. 

     I glance over and see Emery trying to not-so-subtly eat a strawberry off the top of the waffle without using his hands and ends up with whipped cream on his nose. I laugh softly and swipe it off, wiping my finger on a napkin.

     Emery blushes and looks so fucking cute right now, so I lean forward and press my lips to his. He tastes like sugar. Like him.

     “You all can sit over here,” Logan says, pointing to two chairs next to him and Theo.

     We walk over and settle in, Emery already stuffing his face full of waffle.

     “Oh god, these are good,” he moans around a mouthful. 

     Logan bobs his head. “Yeah, my dad loves to cook. Grew the strawberries himself and the eggs are from the chickens outside.”

     “It’s like a homestead out here,” I say, and Emery nods vigorously.

     “It is. Like Alaska. One time I went down a rabbit hole researching homesteading out there, and I can totally see your dad doing that. He could get some sled dogs and do the Iditarod.”

     “What the fuck is that?” Logan asks, and Theo leans over and says softly, “It’s a long-distance sled dog race in Alaska.”

     “Dad would not survive that. He’d miss his greenhouse too much.”

     Theo snorts softly. “True.”

     Basil wanders over with some orange juice. “My ears are burning. You talking about me?”

     “Emery said you should do some sled dog race in Alaska, and we said no way,” Logan explains, and Basil shakes his head, wiping his hands on his apron.

     “Oh, no. That’s not for me. I prefer gardening and smoking in my shed.”

     Emery takes a gulp of his orange juice and then pats his belly. “Couldn’t agree more. And by the way, these waffles are delicious.”

     “Want another?” Basil asks, puffing out his chest, like a proud peacock.

     “I’ll take two more.”

     I eye my boyfriend and he smiles at me. 

     “I won’t eat both. Maybe. I can’t make any promises, August. Look, I have this new pump and it’s a miracle machine. All thanks to you.”

     I reach toward him, pressing my hand to the back of his neck and squeezing gently.

     “Of course, Em. You deserve it.”

     “I do. I deserve all the good things. I know that now.”

     “What pump?” Theo asks, his eyes intent on Emery.

     “Oh, I’m diabetic and have this cool pump I wear now. It delivers my insulin and I have this neat-o blood sugar monitor.”

     He pushes his sleeve up and shows it off before lifting his shirt up and showing off his pump.

     Theo leans close, his eyebrows meeting. “That’s very cool.”

     “I know, right?” Emery replies and then sits back down, scooting his chair really close to mine and linking our ankles together.

     “So, how long have you two been together?” Emery asks. “August and I have been together about a year but we were stepbrothers for a while before that. It was all very scandalous for like two days.”

     Logan’s eyebrows shoot up, and Theo blushes slightly. 

     “Been together like six months. Had to convince him to give me a shot,” Logan says, and Theo glances at his boyfriend.

     “Wasn’t sure you were into me.”

     “Pfft, how could I not be? You’re so damn hot.”

     Theo flushes, his cheeks stained crimson, and he shifts in his seat nervously. I’m surprised he hasn’t disappeared behind his shirt like he did quite a few times last night.

     Caleb and Whit make their way over and sit down, Caleb in Whit’s lap. It’s how they always are. I don’t know how Whit manages it. Caleb is so much bigger than him. But he doesn’t seem to mind it. No, he seems to like it.

     Not that I blame him. That position gives him unfettered access to all the good bits. 

     Basil wanders over again and places his hands on his hips. “So, after breakfast, what’s the plan today?”

     Logan rocks back in his chair and says, “Wanna go see the sea lions down at the wharf?”

     “Gasp!” Emery says. “I do. I so want to!”

     He’s bobbing his head wildly, and I hear a huff, and see Whit sighing, his eyes closed. Oh, he’s not excited at all.

     But then again, his hands are up Caleb’s shirt, doing god knows what, so I’m pretty sure he’s not that depressed about it. And Caleb looks thrilled about meeting some marine animals.

     “Can we pet them?” Caleb asks, and Basil laughs.

     “Nope. They’re mean fuckers.”

     “Bummer,” Caleb says, leaning back against Whit and sighing. “So bummed, babe.”

     “No goats and no sea lions.”

     I bite back a laugh at how despondent Caleb looks and how Whit’s eyebrows have narrowed, desperately trying to make his man happy. They love each other so much. When I first met them, I could just see it, could almost feel it. It’s how I feel about Em. He’s my forever.

     “Oh, the goat is nibbling on my pocket,” Emery says with a laugh. “He’s chewing like crazy.”

     “You got something in there?” Basil asks, trying to get the goat to let go of Emery’s pants.

     “Just some candy. My reserves, just in case I get desperate.”

     “Hmm, dangerous game you’re playing, son,” Basil says and finally manages to dislodge the goat and sets him outside. The goat bleats forlornly at the sliding glass door, and Basil looks broken up about it.

     “Come on, Dad. He’s fine. Just being his usual shit self.”

     “He’s not a shit. Not most of the time. Only when he eats my lettuce without asking nicely.”

     Theo laughs as Whit huffs, and then Emery stands up, clapping his hands together.

     “Well, let’s go see the sea lions. I can’t wait.”

     “We gotta get changed first, Em,” I remind him. 

     He bobs his head. “Right. Changed and then we can go. Give us twenty. Maybe thirty, depending on how hot August looks.”

     My face flushes, and I pull him toward the stairs. Thank god we are staying somewhere else tonight. 

     “Em,” I begin as we close the bedroom door. “You did confirm our hotel for tonight, right?”

     “Pfft, of course I did…I think I did. Oh fuck. Let me check.”

     He pulls out his phone and then starts scrolling endlessly, mainly because he doesn’t actually delete his messages…or check them, for that matter. I swear to god, this man.

     “Ummmm, yes. I have it here.” 

     He holds up his phone and looks so damn proud, I don’t have the heart to tell him that those are the wrong dates too. So, I just smile and decide I’ll ask Basil if we can crash here again tonight. He doesn’t seem to mind.       He’s the friendliest guy on the planet. And if he says no, then I’ll book another place somewhere. I’ll figure it out.

     “Looks good, Em,” I say and reach out, pulling him in for a kiss before leading him into the shower.

     It’s always a fucking adventure with him. 

     Wouldn’t change it. Nope. I would keep it just the way it is. Forever.




     “So, when do your friends get here?” Basil asks us as we make our way down the wharf. We saw the sea lions lying lazily on the wooden planks but had to leave once Caleb got them all riled up by mimicking their barks. One even started humping another quite excitedly, much to Emery’s amusement. “They’re like us, August!”

     Whit had to haul his husband away, his cheeks flaming. 

     But Caleb wasn’t deterred. He looked mighty proud. “I’m a sea lion whisperer, Whit. I’m a fucking fish king.”

     “They aren’t fish, they’re mammals,” Whit retorted.

     “Fuck, you’re right. You’re so smart,” Caleb said, nuzzling into Whit’s neck.

     “Um, they should be here by this afternoon,” I say as we all make our way to the candy store.

     Basil stuffs his hands in his pockets and nods. “Well, have them come over. I’d love to meet them. Who is it again? I forgot their names.”

     “My cousin, Sem, and his husband, Magnus, and then Luke and Elliot.”

     “Ah. Okay, think I got it now.”

     “Oh, and Lex and William are coming. Lex sort of invited himself,” Emery says, and I eye my boyfriend. God. Lex. Honestly, this is going to be one hot mess.

     “Oh, the more the merrier. I can make a whole feast! I can make a turkey! Mashed potatoes!”

Basil is mumbling to himself, already planning some kind of Thanksgiving spread for us as we make our way around the crowds of people.

     “I’m having so much fucking fun,” Emery says, leaning into me, his cheeks flushed and his hair a little wind-blown. 

     I’m so fucking glad he’s happy. He deserves it. He deserves all the good things. 

     “Oh, look, it’s the candy store!” Emery shouts, looking a little too excited. I need to watch what he gets while we’re in the store so he doesn’t go overboard. Not that I’m his dad, but fuck, I worry about him. I want him to live for a long-ass time, and I want him to be healthy. But he’s doing so well. He’s changed so many of his bad habits and is trying his best. I know he is. Makes me so proud of him.

     “Oh god, I looked this store up online and they have sugar-free chocolate which I’ll totally try, but don’t keep me away from the taffy, August. I can’t survive it. I need some.”

     “Of course, Em. You can get whatever you want. You can’t consume it all at once though. That’s where I draw the line.”

     “Oh yes, be all bossy. Makes my dick hard. Doesn’t deter me at all.”

     We walk into the store a second later and Emery groans loudly, drawing the eyes of a few salespeople. I’m used to it by now. I don’t even blush. It’s just how it is. He’s made me a better man, that’s for sure.

     “I want it all!” Emery says as he moves toward the cases of candy. My eyes swivel from him to Basil and  Logan who are holding up long colorful suckers and pretending they’re swords. Caleb joins in, leaving Whit, Theo, and I to watch these grown men fight to the death.

     “Ever thought this would be your life?” Theo asks, and Whit shakes his head.

     “No. Never.”

     “Would you change it?” Theo asks, and Whit shakes his head again.

     “Hell no.”

     I wholeheartedly agree. They’ve made our lives fuller. Not at all what we expected.

     “Same,” Theo replies as Basil whacks Caleb’s sucker far too hard and his breaks right down the middle. It hangs limply in Basil’s hand and his eyes widen.

     “Oh shit,” Theo mutters, and a laugh escapes my mouth. I barely know the guy, but I’m not even surprised this happened.

     “I didn’t mean it,” Basil says, and Logan guffaws loudly. 

     “Better go pay for it. You break it, you buy it,” Logan tells his dad.

     Basil slinks to the check-out area and sets the broken lollipop on the counter, looking bashful. Meanwhile, Logan twists his in his hand like nunchucks and ends up accidentally letting go of it. It flies through the air and knocks a row of teddy bears off a shelf, and Theo shakes his head, chuckling lowly.

     “Oh god, we can’t take them anywhere.”

     “We really can’t,” I say, peering over my shoulder and seeing Emery pointing at something very enthusiastically, laser-focused. The woman behind the counter is placing a concerning number of things in his basket, and I wonder what the fuck is happening. 

     I make my way over, and Emery beams at me. 

     “I’m getting one of everything. Life is short, right? Let me eat candy!”

     “Alright, Em. You do that.”

     I let him continue on down the display case, talking animatedly with the woman.

     He only stops when his phone rings and he picks it up. 

     “Hey, Mags! Yep! I’ll have August check his phone. He’ll send you our address and you can meet us!”

     He chats for a few more seconds before hanging up and moving back down the candy aisle, hyper-focusing on his task.

     I check my phone and see a few texts from Magnus.

     Mags: Where the hell are you? 

     Mags: I need food. 

     Mags: Did you really stay at a stranger’s house last night?

     I chuckle as I respond, sending him a brief update. Oh god, when Sem and Magnus show up….

     I glance over at Basil and Logan who are bashfully putting the teddy bears back on the shelves, and then shake my head.

     Nah, they’ll all get along perfectly.


Farmers Market - Sem and Maggie.png

Chapter 1



     The audiobook drones over the RV speakers as we make our way through Santa Cruz, Sem’s gaze intent on the road before him. It makes me all sorts of horny watching him steer this big thing through traffic. If he wasn’t so safety-conscious, I’d lean over and suck his dick while he drives.

     “Almost there, Maggie,” he says, turning to peek over at me, and my dick hardens in my pants. Hm, he better find parking soon because there are things I want to do to my man…my husband.

      “Quit lookin’ at me that way,” he says, shifting in his seat, his big hands clutching the steering wheel.

     I bite back a smirk because I know how I affect him; I know how much he wants me. Sometimes I wake up and find him watching me intently, love in his eyes. I don’t know how I got so lucky, but he adores me.

     “I can’t help it that you’re so hot,” I say as he pulls his RV into a parking spot like it’s no big deal. It makes me squirm a little more in my seat. God, this trip has been long, and I’m ready to sit on him.

     “It’s only been seven hours, Maggie,” he says, and I roll my eyes as I unbuckle.

     “Yes, well…hurry. Seven hours is too long.”

     Quickly, I move into the back of the RV, toward the bedroom, shutting the blinds and grabbing the lube. I’m gonna ride him like a professional. He may be good at steering this motorhome, but I’m great at steering his dick. Right into my hole.

     Sem appears in the doorway, his hair loose around his shoulders, and I can’t wait to run my fingers through it.

     Shucking off my clothes, I gesture toward him. “Off. All of it. And lie down on the bed.”

     “You gonna fuck me?” he asks as he slowly removes his shirt. Far too slow for me. 

     “No. I’m gonna ride you, Sem. Now hurry.”

     But he doesn’t hurry. He takes his time. Gah, this man’s patience. I swear to god, it is agony. 

     I’m naked now, my dick hard and sticking straight up, and I can see Sem eyeing it. He wets his lips, his pupils dilating, and I wrap my hand around it, pumping slowly.

     It doesn’t hurry him up though, he still takes his goddamn time taking off his pants and then pulling his boxers off, kicking them leisurely to the side. Finally. Finally, that big cock is free, and I feel my mouth water as I crawl to the edge of the bed and beckon him to come closer.

     He takes a step toward me, his hand reaching for my head as he gently slips his dick right between my lips.

     My jaw aches as I run my tongue along the underside of him, swallowing around him. His breath comes out a little broken as he watches me bob my head, sucking him as far as I can and then popping off of him before doing it all over again.

     Minutes pass, me working him to the edge before finally releasing him and patting the mattress. 

     “Come on, lie down. I’m going out of my mind.”

     “I like that you’re going crazy for me,” he says softly, and I lean forward and kiss his hip tenderly.

     “Always. Now hurry before I start to get upset.”

     Sem smirks as he lies down, and I don’t waste another minute. I crawl up him, grabbing onto the lube, squirting some onto my fingers, and working myself open. It’s gotten so much easier, taking him. It’s why I have to practice fucking him all the time. That big dick won’t make it in all on its own.

     Sem’s eyes darken as he watches me spear myself over and over, his hand wrapping around my dick and stroking until I’m panting.

     “God, yes. Fuck, Sem,” I moan, and his grip around me tightens.

     “Remember when I first touched your dick?” he asks, and I manage a small eye roll because of course I remember. I remember it all.

     “Of course,” I gasp, his thumb grazing across my slit.

     “You always take me so good,” Sem says, and that’s it. I can’t take it anymore, I rise up, slot him right at my hole, and sink down. It’s slow going, that big dick stretching me and filling me completely, but I manage like I always do.

     Sem’s hands are clutching my hips, his eyes a little wild as I sink down. I love that I can throw this man over the edge like this, that I can drive him wild. When he finally bottoms out, we let out a collective sigh.

     “You ready for this?” I ask, and he nods, a bead of sweat rolling down his temple.

     And before I can even move, he’s lifting me up and slamming me back down on his cock.

     My breath leaves my body, my mouth open in a gasp.

     “Gonna bounce you on my dick, Maggie. Think you can take it?” he asks, and I stare down at him as he does it again.

     I can do nothing but whimper as he shoves me down over and over on his hard length. And here I thought I was going to be in control of this situation. I am so not. He’s just using me, using my hole. And I love it.

     “Fuck, you feel so damn good,” Sem growls as he works me closer and closer to the edge. “Your ass is incredible.”

     “Nggggh,” I moan as he bounces me harder still. My entire body is in flames, my cock leaking profusely. I should try and take back control, but I am helpless.

     Fuck, I love when he does this.

     “You gonna come?” he asks, and I bob my head, trying to form words, but he’s fucked them right out of me.

     A tingling settles at the base of my spine, and I need to come. I want to explode across his chest. But instead, he rolls us over so I’m suddenly beneath him, my feet settling on his chest as he leans up, the muscles in his body rippling, sweat dripping down his chest as he rails into me.

     “Should tie you up,” he pants. “The way you were lookin’ at me. Driving me crazy.”

     “Yes. Yes. Yes,” I grunt as he pounds me into the mattress. I reach down, grasping on to my dick and pumping it frantically, chasing my release, and Sem fucking likes what he sees. Oh, he does because his thrusts become choppy and he loses his rhythm.

     “Oh fuck,” he moans. “Hurry.”

     And that’s all I need. I explode across my chest, my entire body trembling as Sem thrusts into me two more times before filling me up. Then we just lie there, his body hovering over mine, his cock still inside of me.

     Hell, it never gets old.

     “I love you,” he says, and I blink up at him, reaching up a trembling hand to cup his cheek.

     “Mmm. Love you more.”


     After cleaning up and kissing Sem senseless while he tenderly wiped me down, we finally make our way out into the cool spring air. It’s spring break for me at the school so I have the entire week to just do nothing. I mean, as a teacher, we are always grading assignments, but that’s for the drive back home. 

     “They’re somewhere on the boardwalk,” I say, looking at the wooden pier that stretches out into the ocean.      “Said they were getting candy.”

     My stomach rumbles at the thought of food and Sem glances down at me.

     “I’m hungry,” I explain, and Sem pulls me into his side, his big hand settling on my back. I always feel so safe with him, like nothing can hurt me.

     “I’ll get you some food. What you want?”

     It’s no contest. “A burger with fries and a milkshake.”

     He eyes me, and I shrug. “You worked me into a hunger state, Sem. I am famished.”

     He smiles at me, those sexy lips turning up, and I nestle in a little closer to him, inhaling the scent of him. He smells like sex.

     I want to let him carry me, but I also don’t wanna be weird. August texted me that they were hanging out with a man named Basil, his son Logan, and Logan’s boyfriend today. I would like to make a good impression. 

     Koala bear cuddles are something I’ll save for later, when I know them better.

     We stop at a small burger joint at the end of the boardwalk and we order our food. After finding a picnic table to sit down at, I text August to let him know where we are and what we are doing. As soon as our food arrives, I see the group making their way toward us.

     Whit and Caleb. 

     Emery and August.

     And people who I assume are Basil, Logan, and Theo.

     They all wave and gather around our table, Caleb leaning over me and sneaking some fries from my plate.  Without hesitation, I swat his hand away.

     “I will chop off your fingers, Caleb, if you touch my food again.”

     “Nah, you’re too weak to do that,” Caleb says as he steals another fry.

     “Fine, I’ll have Sem do it. You know how protective he can be.”

     Caleb snorts loudly. “Like he’d hurt his favorite cousin.”

     Sem eyes Caleb and then eyes me. 

     “Oh, do not even tell me this is a hard decision, Sem. You’re my husband, for fuck’s sake.”

     “True,” he says, looking torn. Well, we can discuss this later. I can really show him what his priorities should be. Probably by fucking him nice and hard. Or maybe edging him. I love that. 

     Maybe tying him up.

     I slap at Caleb’s hand again as Basil leans forward. 

     “Hey. I’m Basil! This is my son, Logan, and his boyfriend, Theo!”

     He positively beams and looks so damn proud. 

     “Hey, guys,” Logan says. “You’re all super hot. Seems we’ll fit in just fine,” he says and leans into Theo who blushes.

     “Oh my god, Logan.”

     “What?” he asks. “It’s the truth. I mean, look at you.”

     He wets his lips, and I let out a little snicker because Theo looks like he wants to melt into the floor and die.

     “Don’t worry, Theo. We are used to the weird. You haven’t gotten to know the Van Beeks yet,” I say, pointing to Sem and Caleb. “And there is Luke too, who will be arriving later on. You will fit right in.”

     “And who says you aren’t weird, tiny?” Caleb asks, and I nudge him with my elbow.

     “I am the most normal here. I guarantee it.”

     He snorts and so does Sem, and I send my husband a deathly glower.

     “Love you,” Sem murmurs, and my heart just melts. I’ll never get over hearing that.

     “Oh, hamburgers! Yummy. You guys want anything?” Basil asks, bouncing on his feet.

Emery pipes up first. “Yes! I want something. Can we get a milkshake too, August? Ooh, they have banana bread ones. I love bananas and bread.”

     “Same,” Sem says as I eye the bag hanging around Emery’s wrist which I assume is filled with copious amounts of treats. I meet August’s stare. He’s so far gone for this guy; Emery is totally getting his banana bread shake.

     I arch an eyebrow at my best friend and he just shrugs.

     When I glance back, I see Caleb happily munching on one of my fries again. Whit is next to him, and I waggle a pickle at my friend.

     “Keep your man away from my food, Whit, or I am going to enact revenge. And we both know I am far more creative than you.”

     Whit stares at me as Caleb nuzzles into his neck, distracting his husband from giving him a stern talking-to.       Although I doubt that deters Caleb, he probably likes Whit scolding him.

     Hm. I don’t need to know this, nor do I need to be thinking of it. 

     “Let’s get you some food,” Whit says softly, and Caleb looks up at him. 

     “You gonna feed me?”

     Whit huffs and shifts off the picnic bench, leading him toward the ordering counter. My eyes turn back to Sem. He’s eaten all his food and is leaning back slightly, looking like a fucking king. His lap is the perfect throne for my ass.

     Just like it was earlier.

     And the way Logan is pawing at Theo, I assume they’d be fine with some PDA.

     I scoot over, plopping right down in Sem’s lap. His big hands wrap around my waist, and he pulls me back against his chest as I continue eating my burger.

     His cock plumps up against my ass, and I wiggle against it. I can’t wait until we are alone again. The things I’m gonna do to him.

     “Oh look, guys!” Basil says with a gasp. “They make hamburgers with googly eyes on them! They’re on the kid’s menu, which is ridiculous! Adults should have fun too!”

     He looks positively delighted, and I hear Sem chuckle behind me.

     “I ordered three because they look tiny,” he says and then turns back to the counter and chats some more with the guy behind it. It’s like he’s made a new best friend.

     “Basil is…unique,” Theo says softly, catching my gaze, and I nod. 

     “We are all unique up in here,” I say and then reach back and thread my fingers through Sem’s hair. “My man is the most special.”

     “Nope!” Caleb chimes in, plopping down next to me. “Whit is the most special.”

     I roll my eyes. “Yes, well, we can agree to disagree.” Whit eyes me, and I smile at him. “No offense, friend.”

     “None taken,” he replies as Caleb pulls Whit into his side.

     A few minutes later their food is delivered. Basil sits down with a happy sigh, showing off his googly-eyed hamburgers.

     “Should I name them before I devour them?” he asks, and I eye the man.

     “Why not?” I say and then take another bite of my burger.

     Basil shifts in his seat and then shakes his head. “Nah, that would be too crazy. When we’re done with this, you wanna go mini golfing?”

     “I love mini golfing,” Sem chimes in, and I glance back at him. 

     “Do you really?”

     “Yep,” he says, and I bob my head. Well, that’s something new, I guess. Still learning all the things about Sem, it seems.

     “Sounds like a plan then,” I say, and Basil takes a huge bite out of his burger, a googly eye sticking to his top lip. Looks like he has an eyeball mustache now.

     “Can’t wait. I am a mini-golf pro,” he says around a mouthful of food.

     “No, you’re not, Dad,” Logan says. “Finn is the pro. You just like to chat the entire time and feed crackers to the fish in the coy pond.”

     “I do not!” he says and then leans a little closer, that googly eye still on his lip. It’s looking at me, right into my soul.

     “But listen, I have weed gummies in my car. You all wanna get high and hit some balls?”

     I let out a shocked laugh and then bob my head. Because why the hell not?

     Let’s do this. 

     Crazy fuckers.

Chapter 2



     Maggie’s ass looks fucking nice bending over and hitting that ball around. It’s like he’s arching back and tempting me on purpose. That ass I was inside earlier, never gets old. Just want to fucking stay in there all damn day.

     “Your turn,” Maggie says, wagging the putter at me, accidentally hitting me in the side. Yeah, my man ate a weed gummy and now he’s high as fuck. I ate one too but it doesn’t seem to be doing much other than making me feel horny.

     Like really, really horny. Like, my dick is sticking out and there’s nothing I can do about it. I just accept my fate. People can look…or not. Doesn’t bother me. Not my fault my husband is hot as fuck.

     “This stuff make you horny, Basil?” I ask, and Basil startles slightly. Probably because I don’t say much usually. But it’s not like he can miss me, I’m kind of a big dude. Or, maybe my question was inappropriate? Hm…not sure.

     Basil looks at me, his eyes a little unfocused, and he bobs his head. “Hell yeah. My wife isn’t here though, so I’m gonna have to be creative!”

     “Dad,” Logan chastises with a laugh, and Basil snorts, leaning down and slapping his leg. 

     “Sorry, at least I don’t take carrots up my butt.”

     Logan gasps, looking part horrified and part amused. “I’ve never done that, just so you know. Now cucumbers….”

     Theo hides behind a bush and refuses to come out. 

     “Theo is very sensitive, but we will bring him around. Can’t be hiding behind bushes all the time in this family,” Basil says and then hands me another weed gummy. 

     I probably shouldn’t eat it, but then again, why the fuck not? Nothing better to do. And what’s the worst that can happen? I get more horny? 

     I could live with that, to be honest. My man can take it all day long.

     “Sem, it’s your turn,” Maggie says again, drawing my eyes to him.

     I wanna pick him up, wanna press him against me. He always smells so damn good. I could just breathe him in all damn day.

     You know what? Why the fuck am I waiting? I should just take what I want.

     My putter falls to the ground, and I reach out to him, pulling him up into my arms. He wriggles against me, and I press my face into his neck. 

     “Don’t care if it’s my turn,” I say, kissing my way across his neck. “Gonna eat you up.”

     “Oh god,” Maggie says and then leans into me. “We are giving everyone a show.”

     “Don’t care,” I say because I don’t. I’ll kill anyone who looks at him funny. I’ll burn the motherfucking place down. Just try me, assholes. Make me mad.

     “Gonna take Maggie away for now,” I say and then head toward the bathrooms I saw inside while buying tickets. Gonna suck his dick. Just stick it right in my mouth. Can’t wait. Can’t fucking wait another minute. 

     “We can’t actually fuck here, Sem,” Maggie says, being entirely too reasonable.

     “Yeah, we can.”

     “There are children here, and I didn’t bring lube.”

     “Got some in my pocket,” I say, and Maggie leans back, looking flushed and fucking delicious.

     “Gonna eat your ass, actually. Get it nice and wet, I say softly and he shifts in my arms.

     “You are not,” he says, and I smirk at him. 

     “Could tie you down. Could do all sorts of things to you with you not movin’.”

     Maggie swallows as I push the bathroom door open, startling a young boy in the process. His eyes are wide, his lips forming a small O, and I suddenly feel guilty for scaring the little guy. His pee escapes the urinal and hits the wall as he watches us.

     “Put me down,” Maggie hisses, and I drop him gently to the floor.

     The boy shuffles on his feet, continuing to pee on the wall, forming a small puddle on the floor.

     “Should probably wait outside,” I say and grab on to Maggie’s hand, pulling him back out again. May need to find those parents and pay for therapy or something. He’s probably never seen a big dude carrying another man into a bathroom before.

     “So, I take it you’re not gonna do all those things you mentioned moments ago?” Maggie says with a sassy smile.

     I lean down and pull his lips to mine. 

     “Not with piss on the floor and a scared kid,” I say and then lead him back outside. Everyone has moved down the course so we have to walk a little ways to find them. As we do, Emery jogs past us, looking winded. “I just hit the ball so fucking far. It’s gone forever. My best shot yet. Gotta get a new one.”

     I chuckle and then turn to see Caleb kissing his putter as Whit winces and pulls out a package of disinfectant wipes from his back pocket.

     “Gonna make a hole-in-one, babe,” he says as he lines his putter up with the bright blue golf ball.

     He aims and misses before trying again. Whit stands behind him, his eyebrows bunched, and I wonder what the dude is thinking.

     Hm, probably about Caleb’s butt and the way he’s wiggling it right now.

     Should probably stop thinking about my cousin’s butt.

     “We’re almost done,” Basil says, having lost the scorecard somewhere around hole one. “Wanna get pizza after this and then come back to my place and watch a movie?”

     I don’t know why, but I don’t wanna say no to this dude, so I just bob my head and everyone else does too.

     Seems like we’re gonna be hanging out with Basil and his fam tonight.

     But as long as I have Maggie next to me, I’ll go pretty much anywhere.


     Luke texts me, stating that they’re close, and I can’t fucking wait. The weed gummies have hit me big time, and I feel like I’m fucking Goliath. I wanna squash something. Wanna blow something up. And yeah, Caleb is here so I can probably convince him it’s a good idea, but Luke will be down for it.

     “Got any good pumpkins out there?” I ask Basil suddenly, startling him. We are watching a movie in his living room, and yeah, it’s fun, but this would be funner.

     Who doesn’t like blowing shit up and watching fire rain down from the sky?

     No one, that’s who.

     “Huh?” he asks, looking confused.

     “Got any big pumpkins out in the greenhouse we could use…for, you know, blowing up?”

     Theo chuckles as Caleb pumps his fist in excitement.

     “I am down!” Caleb yells a little too loud, causing Whit to wince.

     “You wanna blow up my pumpkins?” Basil asks, and I bob my head.

     “Gonna have to. Gonna have to sacrifice one for the greater good, man.”

     Basil looks unsure, probably a little too attached to vegetables if you ask me, but finally bobs his head.

     “Yeah, okay. I have a few I’m not in love with,” he says, and I smile, already planning the next few hours. My gaze turns to Theo.

     “You’re a chemist, right? You make explosives?” I ask, and Theo eyes me warily.

     “Why do you want to know?”

     “For the greater good.”

     He meets my stare, looking unsure, but Logan interrupts. “My man is the best bomb maker.”

     “I have never made a bomb in my life,” Theo replies, folding his arms over his chest.

     “Yeah, but I mean, you do make things explode. I’ve seen you.”

     Theo flushes and looks a little stuck. Because I’m sure this dude can figure out how to make things go boom. He looks like the type. He looks super smart, like Maggie.

     “Fine. I can figure something out, I’m sure.”

     Caleb stands up, pumping his fist even more enthusiastically, and I feel the urge to join him. I move Maggie off my lap and join my cousin, bumping his fist and glancing down at Theo.

     “What do we need, dude?” Caleb asks. “To make a bomb?”

     Theo looks slightly startled.

     “I didn’t agree to build a bomb…”

     “He can totally build a bomb,” Logan says, and I hear Maggie snicker behind me. “He’s super smart.”

     “Logan,” Theo says and then turns to face me again. “I am not building a bomb. I’m not going to prison for this…but I can put something together with some fertilizer and oil….”

     I’m already moving with Caleb toward the garage, or what I think is a garage. I am ready. I am ready for a bit of crazy. Emery smashes into us from behind, chattering nonstop about candy and pumpkin spice lattes.

     “I can’t wait for this, guys,” Emery says and then trips slightly, falling into the wall.

     I reach out and steady him, knowing it’s not his fault. This is exciting. 

     “When is Luke getting here?” Caleb asks as we all move into the garage.

     “Not soon enough,” I reply and then turn on the lights.

     Gonna build a bomb. Gonna blow up a pumpkin.


Farmers Market - Luke and Eli.png

Chapter 3



     “What in God’s name is that sound?” I ask, and Luke just smirks at me, looking far too hot. I mean, honestly, could the man just be a little less sexy? It’s ridiculous. And he’s wearing that beanie that I love, those wisps of hair peeking out. He looks edible.

     Disgusting, really. I need more self-control.

     “You heard that boom and thought of me coming, huh, Eli?” Luke says, and I roll my eyes because I did not. 

     “You thought…my man explodes when I fuck him. Just like a bomb.”

     “I have never thought that in my entire life,” I mutter, but now I’m thinking of it. Ridiculous, is what it is. Although, he does come like a cannon when I fuck into him. He loves it when I’m rough. 

     Takes it like the good boy he is.

     “Thinkin’ about it, huh?” Luke says and waggles his eyebrows.

     I huff and ignore him. Because like hell I’m going to admit it. It will only egg him on.

     “Hurry, Eli. Don’t wanna miss the fun,” Luke says and grabs my hand, pulling me toward the back gate of a house. I don’t even know if this is the right address, but then again, I can hear Caleb and Sem howling, so it must be.

     There is no missing that.

     “This is my life now,” I murmur, and Luke smiles at me.

     “Hell yeah, it is,” he says as he pulls me into the chaos.

     There’s fire shooting up from a pumpkin right in the middle of the yard, and Sem and Caleb are cheering while Emery rushes toward it with a fire extinguisher. There are some other people here, names I was told but have already forgotten. One of these strangers is named after an herb, or something.

     I don’t know, and I’m not sure I want to. Not if they encourage this kind of delinquent behavior.

     Thank god Whit is here. At least he has some common sense. 

     Although at the moment, he’s just standing off to the side, shaking his head. He doesn’t seem to be preventing this at all.

     “Hey! You started without me!” Luke says as he barrels in, losing his grip on my hand and leaving me standing there, a goat wandering up and nibbling on my pant leg. Where the hell did it come from? And why is it munching on fabric? That can’t be healthy. Does herb man not feed his animals?

     “Shoo, you creature,” I mutter, but it just latches on, determined to chew a hole through my pants. I wiggle my leg a bit, but it just chomps down harder.

     Infernal thing. I hate farms and farm animals. I’d rather live in a concrete jungle. Not a living soul for miles.

     And certainly not goats.

     I glance up, searching for Luke’s help, but he’s already guffawing with Sem, slapping him on the back and holding on to something that looks a little too much like a blow torch…or a flame thrower.

     “You will not!” I say sternly, and Luke freezes, turning his head to look at me.

     “Gonna punish me if I do, Eli?” he asks, and I feel my cheeks flame. Infernal man. I swear. He has no common sense. 

     It’s why I absolutely adore him.

     But not right now.

     “Do not lose a limb,” I say, and he gives me a thumbs up. I don’t know why I even bother. He does what he wants. I’ll make sure to make him see reason tonight in bed. I’ll give him a good spanking. Fuck that ass nice and good. Make him say how sorry he is for being so bad.

     I shift on my feet, and the goat bleats forlornly when I yank my leg away.

     I glance down at him and sigh. He looks despondent. 

     “You can’t eat cloth,” I tell him, and he bleats again as if he doesn’t believe me. Well, he just looks pathetic. I divert my eyes and see Luke doing something that looks exceedingly dangerous, but he won’t listen to me if I tell him to put down the explosive fertilizer and back away. No, he has serious FOMO and would never.

     So I just glance back at the goat, who probably wonders how he found himself in this situation as well. Apparently, he found the Van Beek equivalent in NorCal.

     He is regretting his life choices.

     “Come on, goat,” I say and then start to walk, but he latches on to my ankle again so I can’t make any forward progress without dislodging him. 

     Fuck me.

     There is nothing to be done. 

     I reach down and pick him up.

     “Do not poop on me,” I say as I make my way over to Whit. He’s the only sensible man I know in this group, apart from August. 

     We congregate together, and I eye my counterparts.

    “And you’re just letting this happen?” I ask as I see Emery whack a pumpkin with some kind of vegetable, like he’s playing croquet. Looks like an asparagus, but I can’t be sure.

     “What would we say?” Whit asks, looking serious. “No?’

     “Yes, we’d say no, absolutely not.”

     Whit eyes the goat in my arms, and I regret my decision to pick him up. Because now he’s nibbling on the collar of my shirt and looking far too cute.

     “Does anyone feed the goat?” I ask, and August nods.

     “Yeah, he just ate a whole cucumber before you got here. Emery fed it to him by accident.”

     “How do you feed a goat by accident?”

     August shrugs. “No clue, but as I’ve come to expect with Em, where there’s a will, there’s a way.”

     “Hm,” I say, eyeing our men who are congregated around a poor pumpkin.

     “This is a terrible idea,” I murmur as we all take a collective step back.

     “Agreed,” Whit says. 

     “We just gotta pray,” August says as Emery whoops and a thin man with an oversized shirt puts some goggles on.

     “Why the fuck are they putting goggles on?” I ask. “And why aren’t Luke and Sem wearing any?” 

     But before anyone can respond chaos erupts. The man with the goggles, staggers back and Emery shouts, his arms flailing. Sem grabs on to Caleb and another tall man next to him is suddenly pulling him back. And then I hear a boom.

     “Oh, hell yes!” someone cries out, and my heart rate triples. Something wet and sticky smacks my face, and the goat bleats happily. My eyes peel open, and I see the goat happily munching on something orange. The pumpkin, I believe.

     I have pumpkin guts on me.

     The smoke has cleared, and I see Emery, Caleb, Sem, and Luke beaming, like they’ve discovered some kind of alien lifeform.

     “That was highly irresponsible,” I say, and an older man chuckles at my tone.

     “It was fun. Best damn thing I’ve done all week.”

     “Right on, Basil,” Sem says, and then they fist bump.

     I am not going to survive this trip. I am going to be sent home in a casket. I swear.

     I glance over at Luke to make sure that he has all his limbs, and when I’m sure that none of his are bleeding, I let out a sigh.

     “My man’s a doctor,” Luke says loudly. “He’s got us covered.”

     “Has what covered?” Magnus says as he walks out the sliding glass door. When he sees the damage, he just sighs and walks over to me. “I don’t wanna know, do I?”

     “You do not.”

     I glance over at Whit and August who are moving toward their men, probably needing to make sure that they’re okay. I would do the same thing, but I feel this fierce need to protect this damn goat.

     The goat bleats, pumpkin around his lips, and our eyes meet.

     Yes, I’ll protect you, little goat. 

     I’ll keep you safe from their shenanigans.


     The sane people congregate inside in the kitchen, August reaching into the fridge and grabbing a box of wine.

     “Would you care for a drink?” August asks, and we all bob our heads, trying like hell to ignore the cheering outside. This can’t be good.

     “Give me a large pour,” I say, setting the goat down. He bleats and trots over to Magnus, who bends down and pats him on the head.

     “So, Elliot, how was your trip up here?” August asks as he fills up my wine glass nearly to the brim.

     “Fine. Flew by. Luke drove while I worked.”

     “Sounds like a blast,” Magnus says as the goat trots over to me once more and nibbles on my pant leg again. He obviously needs attention, so I lean down and pick him back up into my arms. I’ll just hold him until he falls asleep and then…put him somewhere.

     “Whit, did you really meet this family at the farmer’s market?” I ask, and Whit sighs.

     “We did, and Basil and Caleb took to each other…very quickly. Who am I to say no?”

     I eye him and then glance at Magnus. “And you were okay with this?”

     “Of course. Basil is a blast and he has excellent taste in vegetables and marijuana.”

     “And Em is having the time of his life,” August says as I take a large sip of my wine, the goat trying to take a lick too. Not that I’d give a goat alcohol. What kind of animal parent would I be if I did that? Well, not a parent, but a temporary babysitter.

     Oh, who am I kidding? I’m just a stranger who has invaded this man’s house and is drinking his wine…and holding his goat.

     Another explosion rocks the backyard, and I take another large gulp.

     “What are the chances the police come and take our men away?” I ask, and Whit presses his fingers to his temple.

     “Probably a very good chance,” Whit replies when everyone else begins to drink more and more. Pretty soon the box is empty and the police are at the door.

     “Had a noise complaint,” one of them says, and the goat in my arms leans out and nibbles on the officer’s radio. 

     “You are a very small policeman,” Magnus says with a hiccup. “Perhaps I should go into law enforcement.”

     “Sorry about him,” I say, referring to both the goat and Magnus, and then a giggle erupts from my mouth. I’m feeling buzzed. It does help to not take these situations too seriously. I should drink more often when I’m around Luke and explosives. 

     “Who is the owner of this house?” the officer says, and a moment later, the man who I assume is Basil comes walking in, his face streaked with soot and pumpkin.

     “Troy!” he bellows, his face lighting up. “Did you come to visit?” 

The officer’s expression changes, and a slight blush spreads across his cheeks. Hm, what is this? The goat bleats and tries to grab the officer’s ear, but Basil swoops the goat into his arms and puts a hand on Troy’s shoulder.

     “I was called over for a noise complaint,” Troy says and then shifts on his feet. “Is your wife home?”

     “Ah, no she’s out…come in. Come in. I have some pie! Your favorite.”

     The poor man looks conflicted, and I don’t blame him. I’d have a hard time saying no to Basil as well. He’s far too smiley and nice. It would be much easier if he was an asshole.

     “Sure. One slice,” Troy says and then wanders into the kitchen after Basil just as Luke makes an appearance.

     “Eli,” he says, his eyes a little wild, blood dripping off one of his knuckles.

     “Did you blow off a finger?” I ask, moving toward him, worry gnawing at my chest.

     “Nah. Just caught it on the edge of something…come on. Come see what we did.”

     “No thank you,” I murmur, but let him pull me outside anyways.

     It’s carnage. Pumpkin bits everywhere. But Emery, Caleb, and Sem are chatting excitedly with one another as if they didn’t just destroy this man’s backyard. 

     “You do realize that once I get you alone, you are going to be very sorry for this, right?” I ask, arching an eyebrow at him.

     Luke only looks more excited.

     “Can’t wait for you to get me back to the hotel so you can spank some common sense into me.”

     I feel my entire body warm at that. 

     “Perhaps we should go now,” I say huskily, and Luke rolls his eyes.

     “Nah, not yet, Eli. We gotta help him clean up, and I saw a police officer here. We gonna get into trouble?”

     “Not with the way that officer was looking at Basil,” I say softly, and Luke waggles his eyebrows at me.

     “Ah, I see.”

     And my lips turn up at the corners. I’ll have my way with him once we get back to the hotel. For now, I can let him have his fun.

     Then I’m going to spank that ass red and make him come.

Chapter 4



     “That was so fucking fun,” I say as Elliot leads me into the hotel room. He has this serious look on his face, and I know what that means. It means I’m gonna be in trouble. Worth it though.

     The way those pumpkins exploded. Epic. Gonna grow me some of those.

     “In the shower,” Elliot says, and I start to shuck my clothes, moving into the bathroom and doing as I’m told.       Once the water is warm enough, I step underneath the spray and watch as Elliot moves into the bathroom, slowly undressing and making me crazy.

     I’ve needed to be inside of him all damn day. Or him inside of me. Could go either way.

     “Gonna join me?” I ask, and Elliot stares intently at me.

     “Wouldn’t that be a reward for your bad behavior?” he asks, and I let my lips form a pout, blinking at him as the water streams down my face and chest. I might clench my muscles too, letting him see how hot I am. I know it gets him all hot and bothered, even though he’d never admit it.

     “But I’ve been so bad,” I moan and reach down and pump my dick, loving how his eyes rove over my body to my cock and stay there.

     He loves watching me come for him.

     “Come in and wash me, make me beg.”

     It’s all I need to say. He’s naked before I can blink, and I’m pressed up against the wall of the shower, his body sliding against mine.

     A groan escapes my mouth, and I arch my cock up against him, loving how his breath comes out in fragments and shudders.

     “Gonna let me fuck you, Eli?”

     “Perhaps,” he says and then his hands are on my waist, spinning me around. “Hands on the wall. Don’t fucking move.”

     I do as he says, standing there as he runs his soapy hands across my back, thighs, cock, and stomach. I arch into it, loving the feel of it, and when those fingers massage my scalp, I groan and lean back, feeling his lips on my neck.

     “I’m going to rinse you off now, Luke, and then you’re going to go to the bed and put that ass up. I’m going to spank it red and then I’m going to fuck it.”

     My cock jumps between my legs and I nod, letting him rinse out my hair before toweling off and walking into the bedroom. I’m still slightly wet, my skin slick as I find myself face down, ass up on the mattress.

     I can hear Elliot moving around behind me, and I clutch on to the sheets, so damn ready for it.

     The bed dips as he crawls up behind me, and his hand smooths over the globes of my ass.

     “You ready?” he asks, and I nod. 

     “Hell yeah. Gimme,” I say, and I hear a chuckle before his hand whistles down and lands with a slap on my ass.

      Love this. Love being spanked by him. Love how my ass gets all warm and sore. Love that he always makes it better by sticking that tongue right up my hole afterward.

     “You were such a bad boy today, Luke. Using explosives in such an irresponsible manner.”

     “So bad, so, so bad,” I say and feel his hand on my ass again.

     “You deserve this, you want it.”

     “I so do.”

     His hand lands on my ass again, and I groan. “Harder. I can take it.”

     I can feel Eli give in, his hand landing on my cheeks, my upper thighs, my balls, over and over, making me grunt and moan as I take it.

     And when he’s finally done, I feel his face between my sore cheeks, his tongue sliding up my crack. 

     “Oh fuck,” I cry out as he spears me on him, his hand snaking around my front and jacking me off as he fucks me with his tongue. 

     Why the hell is this so good? Why is it like the first time, every time?

     The vibrations of his moans can be felt inside of me, and I know that if he keeps this up that I’m gonna come. But before I can, he’s backing away and flipping me onto my back, my cock standing straight up.

     “I’m gonna fuck your ass later, but right now, I’m gonna use you.”

      Love when his vocabulary gets all slurred, like he’s drunk on me.

     “Go ahead,” I say, and Eli reaches over and squirts some lube onto my cock and sits on me, taking me right into his front hole.

     My whole back arches off the bed, my hands grabbing on to his hips as he works my cock into a frenzy.

     “Oh hell,” I murmur, watching as he bounces on my dick. Oh fuck, this feels so damn good. I love it. Love it.

     “Need more,” I moan, and he leans down, letting me bend at the knees and fuck up into him over and over until we’re both panting, sweat dripping down our bodies.

     And when I come, filling him up, I feel him clench around me in orgasm.

     He collapses on top of me, our chests heaving as we fight for air.

     “Goddamn,” I murmur.


     My hands wrap around him, and I nuzzle into his hair. “Love you, Eli.”

     “Love you too, Luke, but your ass is not safe from me just because you took those spankings so well.”

     “Good. Need to learn my lesson. Gonna teach me how to behave?” I say, and Eli chuckles.

     “You’re fucking ridiculous.”

     “And that’s why you love me.”

     “Yeah,” Eli says, meeting my stare. “It is.”



     “How about we go shoot some guns? Brought mine with me,” I say, and Eli shoots me a look. Yeah, I didn’t tell him I did that. He would have disapproved. Didn’t want to get into an argument over it, so…you know, I just slid them in when he wasn’t looking. 

     “Are you serious, Luke?” he asks, and I bob my head.

     “Brought mine too,” Sem says, and Magnus rolls his eyes.

     “We are not shooting guns. Does Basil look like a man who wants to shoot anything?” Magnus asks.

     Logan shakes his head and claps his dad on the back. “Nah, my dad likes to make love, not war. Just like me.”

     “Oh, but have you ever tried it?” Caleb asks as he peeks over at Whit. “Whit was against them but he gets all excited when he fires one. Same with Elliot.”

     “I do not.”

     “You so do,” I say, jostling him.

     Eli frowns at me and then his lips twitch. Yeah, he’s thinking of it, remembering the power behind each shot, how he felt like some kind of movie villain. 

     Fucked me nice and good after the first time too. Could go for another round of that.

     “How about fishing?” Whit asks, and everyone’s heads swivel to him.

     His brows meet and he shrugs. “Seems like something you’d all like to do.”

     “Nah,” Basil says and then swipes at his eyes. “Can’t do that. Get real emotional when those fishies take their last breaths.”

     Theo snorts and then mutters an apology when Logan nudges him in the side.

     “So, what do we do then?” Sem asks. “Did all the fun things last night.”

     “Maybe we should go get a pig!” Basil squeals and then clears his throat and shuffles on his feet.

     “Mom would kill you if you got another animal.”

     “Yeah,” he says and then sighs, running a hand through his hair and looking forlorn.

     “How about a hockey game?” Emery says. “I love sticks and ice. The remind me of popsicles.” Everyone freezes.

     “Think we could score tickets?” Magnus asks, and Sem shrugs.

     And then suddenly everyone is pulling out their phones, almost frantically searching. Even Eli.

     He probably really didn’t want to shoot those guns.

     “We can totally do it!” Caleb says, pumping his fist. “We could totally get tickets. Wanna go? Is it far?”

     “Like an hour?” Basil says, and everyone nods.

     “I’ll buy! You can Venmo me,” Basil says, and then we watch him shuffling to his desktop computer to purchase tickets, the goat trotting along next to him.

     “Ever been to a hockey game, Eli?” I ask.

     He turns to look at me and scoffs. “Never, and I don’t even really want to go.”

     I roll my eyes and pull him in for a kiss.

     “You’re gonna get feral, baby,” I say. “Gonna love all that fighting and blood.”

     “Absolutely not. I would never. I am sophisticated.”

     Yeah, we’ll see about that. I know how my man likes it. He’s gonna lose his shit when we get there. Can’t wait to see him lose his mind.

     Before I can tell him this, his phone pings. His eyes swivel down to it and he sighs. “Who invited Lex?” he asks.

     “Me! That would be me!” Emery says. “He here yet?”

     “No, they’re an hour out. He saw the exploding pumpkins and would like to be in on the action.”

     “Oooh, yes, I did send him a video. He was very jealous,” Emery says, popping a lollipop into his mouth. “Tell him to meet us at the hockey game. Basil, grab two more tickets. Lex loves violence.”

     “So do I,” Sem says, and I reach out to fist-bump my brother. Eli purses his lips, but I know how he’ll get. I’ll just grab him a beer and some nachos, and when that first fist flies he will be out of his seat, chanting for blood.

     Dr. Elliot. Do no harm. 

     Yeah, we’ll see about that. 

     We will see.

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